Mediocrity

Why is it so easy to get sidetracked?

When do you realize that it hurts to beat your head repeatedly against a wall?

Tonight we showed a 15 min. "preview" video of the film Joshua and I are making about the Engaging Muslims project...

And to put it bluntly it was awful....

The atmosphere in the room... at the end-of-project-celebration potluck... seemed to be more facade than genuine emotion...

A fact that came through in the interviews we did for the film...

Add to that a ridiculously short time-frame for producing a video (esp. while starting a new job), a project director who often left us out of the loop, and a community of people that don't want to be filmed...

And you have a recipe for disaster... or at least mediocrity.

So why didn't I bail last Fall? The signs were all there.

Why haven't I bailed on another project... one for Channel 2... that seems to be way more pain than gain.... No way should you have to call someone 17 times to set up an interview...

In my frustration... one thing is clear...

While I deeply want to write and tell stories... I also want sanity... moments of calm... time in the mountains...

And none of this is worth giving any of that up.